Fun bonding activities with the family in the Valentine season
As a mother of 2 elementary aged kids and a spouse who works along the clock, I find it hard for the whole family to do many activities during the school year. So as a family we make a conscious effort to plan lots of downtime with our kids mostly marked ‘Family Fun Time’.
In our household is usually used for us to build our relationships with each other to better communicate our needs. We as a family also like to take the downtime to actually work on skills ; (strength and weakness) and goals. Being a yoga teacher and a life coach I’m constantly looking for us as a family to learn more through experiential ways. To experience life in its most authentic and true form. By getting out of the way of our children and our own selves we can explore life to the fullest, and explore the adventures of life. Some ideas I’m sharing below.
More Unstructured play:
My kids love it when in the middle of the week or on a weekend my hubby will come home and take them out to the backyard and they get to make up their own games and play without any toys, and props. Once while I was preparing for dinner, I saw that my daughter (who is 7 years old) was taking a yoga class for her brother and dad on the grass without yoga mats and teaching them butterfly pose and bunny breaths(breath-work).
The most expensive gift you can give your kids is your ‘TIME’ and share it with them in abundance.
Cook together as a family:
Cooking is a life skill just like walking, talking, swimming and it's one of the few ways we are different from animals. So it is important that we teach our kids about food, nutrition and cultural rituals and recipes that have been passed down from generations.
The new saying is:
“A family that cooks together, leaves behind a legacy of good health and well-being!”
–Roma Bajaj Kohli
Do chores as a Family:
The core desire of every human behavior is to belong and feel
valued. When we do big tasks around the house and involve our kids to have small or big roles in helping us to complete these tasks, their confidence is boosted. The kids feel valued and proud of their limited abilities.
Giving our kids responsibilities after training them at a specific chore or task will make them feel valuable and a contributor towards the household. They will respect himself much more.
Family Physical activity:
Once a week I would highly recommend doing family activities like hiking, climbing, biking, swimming or any other activity that speaks to you as a family. Anything not too competitive or aggressive just for the sake of fun and thrill. Such activities tell us a ton about ourselves and our kids. These moments of fun activities are also a great way for you to help your kids build team spirit, sportsmanship, as well as enhancing leadership skills in them.
”Play is the highest form of research” –Albert Einstein
Celebrating Failures:
Failing is inevitable. True growth and evolution happens when we
allow ourselves to embrace pain and failures. As a family when our kids see us role play this they learn how to rise up even when the fall feels like the hardest one ever.
Children are great imitators, so give them something great to imitate. Remember to be the role model/parent your younger self needed.
Community service:
Make a monthly, bi-weekly, or weekly ritual to spend time as a
family contributing and helping the needy. This activity as a family has the most profound effect on our growing up generation. This kind of work is very rewarding, and fulfilling. As well as a great habit to instill at a younger age. It gives meaning and purpose to life as you can see how your actions make a difference in the lives of others. Also, increases appreciation for all that we have had, we have right now, and will have in the future.
Meditation & Chanting :
Dalai Lama said “that if every 8 year old in the world was taught how to meditate. We could eliminate violence within one generation.”
Meditation is not challenging. It is hard to just find time together as a family and sit in silence and stillness. Even just a minute of silence before dinner or in the morning before the madness of the day begins. Or like my family before we all go to bed we take a few moments of silence and appreciation for our entire day. Chanting (is repeating a word or a phrase continuously until a desired period of time) keeps the phrase simple and easy to remember ex. Peace begins with me, I’m love, I’m grateful, I’m brave, strong and fearless.
Whatever story you are telling yourself in your head just reverse it. And you will actually find a phrase to overcome those negative self talks. I will often tell my kids when they say I can’t do this. I’ll say how can you reverse that? Often they say I can do this with a gentle smile on their face :) Life has its share of ups and downs. What you make of it is what defines where you will be mostly up or down?
Family meetings:
Weekly family meetings have been a phenomenal way for us to bond as a family. Instead of arguing with each other we now agree to disagree and enjoy the difference in opinions. 15 mins every Sunday evening we spend time as a family going over issues, problems and situations example: towels are often left on the floor, how can we make sure we put them back on the rack? Toothpaste cap never seems to find its way back on, how can we make sure we remember to do that? The kids often come up with great solutions and once they have made those agreements with us they usually stick by it.
Special time:
The best way to improve your relationship with your children is to spend “special time” individually with each of your kids. It may sound insane at first for a time-starved individual. Yet planning and scheduling in advance can make anything happen. The time you need to spend with your kids is no more than 15 mins. Anything more will make it hard for the kids to wean off. Also seating the boundaries clearly about the time beforehand is crucial. Special time is a great way to connect and fill up the desires and wants of our kids to have our undivided attention.
Nature walks:
During this pandemic especially the morning, afternoon, evening nature walks without a purpose and plan are the best thing to do as a fun family activity. Being around nature is uplifting and has positive impacts on our mind and emotions. The sounds of nature are like reset buttons to help you recharge and revitalize.
Planting trees:
Planting a seed, nurturing, watering, waiting patiently for it to grow are just some natural ways we can teach our kids the cycle of life. Taking care of our the environment is a great way to work for a better tomorrow with our kids. This activity as a the family is humbling and grounding.
Consuming Inspirational/educational media:
This one is a really big one. We let kids have down time on TV’s, iPad’s and more. Yet making sure that when you are together as a family you are more intentional about consuming more uplifting, inspirational and educative media content will organically set the tone for your kids to choose wisely when they are by themselves. Also having firm boundaries on how much time you all watch TV, phones and iPads for. If you are off TV yet on the phone at all times your kids are again going to learn the same from you.
Self discipline:
This is an individual routine or daily practice. Our kids are often mocking what they see rather than doing what we are telling them to do. Your daily rituals and discipline towards yourself is what your kids will subconsciously take on as they grow older. The more you honor and respect your boundaries the more you will be able to give from a place of overflow. Self discipline is the highest form of discipline. Who you are when you are alone? What do you do with your time? Defines what and who you will be when around others.
Journaling:
As the world is getting more and more tech-y we are losing the notebooks, diaries and more in time. Keeping a gratitude journal, or just a little notebook with you at all times to write and record all that you feel and experience will change your outlook towards life. As well as reduce your dependency on phones and technology. If you make this your practice your kids will make it theirs too. Having a common family journal where you can record all your family meetings agendas and goals is a great place to start.
Breathwork:
This one is slightly unusual yet very effective. Practicing different types of breathing techniques before bedtime is a fun way to calm your kids down and activates the parasympathetic nervous system to relax and unwind just before bedtime. Do whatever makes you laugh. It doesn’t have to be scientifically approved. Bunny breaths, hissing sounds of the snake, humming bee breath, ujjayi breathing like Darth Vader breath or victorious breath are some fun examples of breathing exercises which will make bedtime even more exciting for your family.